I was too much of my time trying to figure out God. I think one of the things God is teaching me is that he is mysterious, and that's a good thing. It's not mine to figure everything out. Sometimes letting mystery be mysterious is the right path. Much different way of looking at and accepting things. I second guess God too much or try to figure out what he's up to... maybe I just need to let it be, live my life with God as a guide, but quit trying to figure out what this or that means and what's next. God knows what's next. I need to let that be enough for me.

Now that I'm in a healthy ministry environment it's nuts! I'm so unused to what goes on. It's hard to get used to it. I'm affirmed at board meetings. People respect my opinions. People respect me! I love what I do. I love the people around me. I love that I don't have to worry about every thought or idea I have will get me in trouble. I don't have to worry that every idea will be shot down. I do still worry about it, cause I'm so in that mindset from the past. It surprises me when I don't get in trouble or don't get shot down. I'm still getting used to getting a paycheck as well. It's so odd. I'm doing a lot of the same things I did as a volunteer, but now I get paid for it! It's crazy!

First for the local rant. James Meeks is not smart. Let's take CPS kids out of school for three days as a protest over lack of equitable funding. OK... doesn't he realize that taking kids out of school can take away funding if enough kids don't show up! Plus those kids are losing three days of education putting them even farther behind. Taking them to a rich suburb and saying "Let the kids enroll" is stupid as well. None of the students will be admitted, so what's the point. Yes it's good to finally get attention, but I agree with Mayor Daley the media is finally paying attention, but this has been going on for years. The media should have paid attention long ago! And Reverend Meeks, kids are not political pawns.

Now for the other rant. The irony that is the Chicago Tribune. Palin's daughter's pregnancy made front page news, as did a tease for John Kass' column that reads, "Leave the kids alone". Yes Kass is a commentator, but it reads as hypocritical to have both on the front page. Maybe the Tribune could have risen above it and put the story on an inside page.

Politics and the media are out of control. Anyone is fair game, even kids. Kids are being hurt and exploited, and it's just not right.

Took a break from blogging but am now back! I'm not working for a church! I'm doing youth ministry and Christian ed. So far (all of two days) things are good.

The kids are starting back to school next week and I start next week too! Just starting work and school at the same time will be crazy, but I'm looking forward to the challenge.

It's been way too long since I've blogged. Lots going on and some of it I can't share with the world, and that's what blogging is.

God's been kicking my butt all over the place. Two things keep coming up: community and that we were created for it and I need to work with my talents. Figuring out what that means for me has been a journey. I think I know the talent part, but it's really scary, so those inclined to pray, please do. God has gifted me and I haven't really been using those gifts the way God wants. So I'll be trusting God and will use my gifts and see what God has in store for me. Not at all scary.